What women REALLY want
Most Important Factors in Order of Importance:
● Dominant confidence(real man)/social skills/seduction game
● Looks/fashion style/body
Notice that there's nothing here about political views, intelligence, values, work ethic, loyalty, etc. Such traits are however important
when keeping a girl because looks without substance gets very boring. In the beginning though, relationships are often built on very
primal desires. If she could get exactly what she wanted, it would be a hot protector/provider who wields power and fame along with
the other traits I listed.
However, there are many women who do learn what is truly important and place great importance on character traits, but make no
mistake, the primal desires are still very strong. Such women are real keepers. If this confuses you, what do you fantasize about? Big
breasts, round butt, doe eyes, full lips, smooth skin...AND THEN you remember to add intelligent, sweet, loyal, etc. Men and
women are quite alike in that sense so don't judge them for being superficial.
Factor 1 - Game
● Game is the most important factor - being dominant, social/conversational skills, and basic seduction skills will get you very far.
For us Asians, we also must ensure we look the part - absolutely no stereotypical image/behavior/anything.
● Dominant confidence is leading her. Lead by pursuing her non-desperately, lead the conversation, lead physically with touch, lead
by choosing what to do and where to go, lead by escalating. Always lead by being dominant but not threatening. This is the most
● Basic social skill - More is better. Be good with all people in general - men or women, young or old, ugly or hot. Be a good
conversationalist. Have a warm approachable vibe and be able to put people at ease. See Conversation skills and vibe here
● Basic seduction game. This is actually the easier part because it's just a few simple rules. It's mostly about approaching, leading,
Factor 2 - Looks
● Fashion style is about looking your best with the right clothes, having an attractive look, grooming, etc.
● Body/Looks - This doesn't mean being a model because your genetics are set. It means maximizing your appearance by getting fit,
clearing up your skin, more confident/manly body language. In north america and many other countries it means getting bigger and
looking powerful/athletic. Doing these things improves your looks by a lot. See the appearance section on the how Asian men can
If you're scrawny then gaining weight will take time (about 1-2 years) but is perfectly doable - even for ectomorphs. Changing the
rest of your image is easy.
Factor 3 - Assets
● Lifestyle is about having a fun life.
● Money is about being well-off as in living comfortably or having lots of freedom with less money. To a woman, it means you have
the ability to provide for a family. Well-off to me means making 2x to 3x as much as the average. For example, here in the usa this
means making like 80,000 usd a year while working 40 hours a week or earning $50,000 usd a year while working part time. See
Looks, money, fame, power, and status are shortcuts to get girls faster. I already covered looks and money above. Money, status,
and fame are not as easy to come by for many of us. Also, with those three, you'll attract many women with questionable intentions.
Fame - Fame can come in many forms. Even being a local business expert or speaker can count for fame.
Power - Managers, bosses, teachers, police, etc. You don't need to control half the city's drug routes to have power.
Status - This is easily manufactured. Be well liked, treat people well, frequent the same establishments and get friendly with the staff
and tip well so when you visit with your girl, you'll be treated like a vip. Having lots of friends that respect you also gets you status.
Being known and respected equals status.
Related to status is that women want what other women want. If you're popular with women, she will want you. The reasoning
behind this is that those women who like you are like votes. The more you have, the better. The psychological reasons behind are
known as social proof and also scarcity, but that's beyond the scope of this guide.
The biggest turn on for women is being desired in a non-needy and confident way by a high-value guy. That means being pursued
without desperation. To be wanted without being needed. A female loves to feel desired for everything that she is - not just the
Be Present AKA Be in the Moment with Her
Always give her 100% of your attention when you're with her. There is nothing else in the world. Focus on the emotional state that
you two are sharing and amplify that energy. Avoid being stuck in your head analyzing.
Strong First Impression
Having dominant confidence while looking attractive is the best first impression you can make. First impressions are extremely
important. They tend to stick even if they're proven wrong later on. So here's how you make the best first impression, practically
Be fit - not scrawny or fat. Preferably muscular.
Good body language
Good spoken game/conversation skills
If you can work this in, even better:
● Be accompanied by attractive females
● Have signs of wealth
● Have a butler named Alfred
She wants a Real Man
A well adjusted woman wants the following. Note: Some women who have been abused or feel undeserving of a good guy and
want abusers but they are not the norm.
She wants extreme masculinity WITH control. An asshole is someone with extreme masculinity without control. A nice guy is a near
zero masculinity male with high self control. She wants the asshole that has self-control. Think of how men love feminine women with
brains. Well, she wants a masculine man who has control. Those are the perfect combinations.
Women often describe this guy as a "bad boy with a heart", "a tough guy with a soft spot for only me", and "dangerous and exciting
but actually a real softie".
It is commonly agreed that the men that do the best with women have game, looks, assets.
This man has roughly 80% alpha qualities and 20% beta qualities. It could even be closer to 90% and 10%.
The ideal man is her superior. She can respect and willingly follow their leadership. Although women are independent, they do long
for someone who is worthy of following and supporting. Think of it as a "sweet surrender". It's the same way men long to find that
"princess". Someone who is feminine, sweet, loyal, and supportive. We want to care, protect, and provide for such a woman.
Feminazis will object to this but they're man repellent, which invalidates their opinions. No man wants to date a militant feminist unless
he's a neutered ass-kisser.
I like and support feminists, who want EQUAL rights and EQUAL respect. I hate and oppose extreme-feminists/feminazis, who hate
men and want to oppress and demonize males. Men and women have equal value as human beings but we are innately different and
we need to respect those differences. I would never ask a woman to fight off burglars. That's my job. I hope in exchange, she never
asks me to breastfeed.
She wants a man who is smarter, more athletic, more successful, etc than her. The one thing she doesn't really want is a man who is
prettier than her because she'll feel less feminine.
Being masculine is about having high testosterone and listening to your nature. Our natures are dominant confidence, boldly sexual
towards females, physically powerful, fun/unpredictable, action/ambition/risk taking, independence, leadership, aggression against
enemies and competitors, and to protect and provide for our chosen female.
Tara Reid made a very astute remark "I like it when a guy makes me feel like a little girl and a woman at the same time" - the
leadership, teasing, protecting, providing, and fun satisfies the little girl. The sexual and and dominant strength satisfies the woman.
Another way of describing the masculine man is "honorable warrior" or "white knight". You see how they both possess the masculine
power as well self control. He's not a rapist or barbarian even though he could easily do so with his combat skills.
The control part shown by not sexually assaulting/harassing a female, not aggressing towards others without a good reason, and to
protect and provide without ending up a slave to her.
You don't really need to be taught these things. They're all within us. However, society has long tried to brainwash it out of you -
especially Asian men due to the racist media.
The masculine man thrusts his presence onto the world. He's an active force. A feminine female is a receptive force. She absorbs the
world. She is a passive force. Do not mistaken the passive force as weakness. It's a different kind of power. She has the power to
subdue a man's active force. When the opposing forces match, you get a good fit. This is why highly feminine women end up with
masculine men and girly men end up with masculine women. The later make for miserable couples because neither one is attuned to
their real natures.
"If you look at romance novels -- basically the female version of porn -- they all follow more or less the exact same pattern: hard
and rugged bad-boy type male hero is troubled but strong, and as he slowly opens up and shares his true emotions and desires with
the heroine, she’s able to support him, to save him and ultimately fall in love with him. Of course, they live happily ever after. This is
more or less the blueprint of seduction: a strong, high status, attractive exterior (lifestyle and looks), fearless, and able to open up and
share your vulnerable side with her (and theoretically, only her). Women get weak in the knees for this. And it’s not even conscious
in them most of the time." (I grabbed that from the Internet somewhere)
Note: Women aren't attracted to men who cheat. It's just that men who cheat tend to have alpha qualities, which is the traits they're
after - not the cheating.
She Wants to Feel Like the Female
This is just an extension of the previous section. You take care of being a man and she'll automatically feel like the female. If you
mess up and act like a bitch then she'll have to man up and wear the pants in the relationship and she'll hate you for it. Similarly, if you
are too romantic then she'll also feel less feminine. Dotting on someone is a classic woman's trait.
Conversely, when courting her, if you don't chase, then they'll feel less feminine.
It's all about balance.To find the right balance, I suggest you give her the romance on an as needed basis by observing her mood. If
she's withdrawn, or unconfident then it's a good time to lift her spirits.
This is related to the section above, "She wants a man". She wants you but ironically, she must never "have" you.
She must never have you trapped or tamed. Be with her without being owned by her. In other words, be the independent alpha male
that she wants, but never let her think she's controls you or she'll lose attraction to you. It's the same way a student looses respect for
a master he can defeat.
She Wants to Feel an Emotional Rollercoaster/Adventure
They live through their emotions - the whole spectrum of them like love, hate, laughter, joy, sadness, jealousy, awe, surprise, shock,
fear, disgust, embarrassment, etc. They fall in love through their ears (but they still like hot guys). Women need emotional stimulus the
way men need sex. Engage their emotions more than their intellect or facts.
Never bore a woman. Making her angry or sad is better than boring her. Men who retain their childlike charms of adventure and
curiosity are extremely attractive to girls. I don't mean immature but willing to try new things, open to explore and enjoy the world
Obviously, you want to do more of the happy stuff but the negative stuff from time to time is helpful as long as it's not "real" - like a
horror movie. She wants to be on an adventure that has the hints of danger WITHOUT danger. Think rollercoaster. They're
machines designed to make you feel massive excitement and fear yet they're far safer than a car. Give her that life. Take her to a gun
range, ride rollercoasters, shark cage diving, take her to scenic places like cliffs getting smashed by the ocean, indoor surfing, take
them to a skyscraper observation deck, take her to see the aurora borealis, snowshoe at a ski resort, indoor skydiving, go karts,
skinny dipping, bedroom role play, send her gifts at work, prank her, surprise her, pretend to destroy her favorite jeans with a fake
2nd pair, etc. You can also copy tv and film concepts like Blackout - a tv show where contestants must touch something in the dark
and guess what it is.
The worst men are nice guys because nice guys play it safe by sanitizing all their interactions and make her feel NOTHING. She'll
feel like she's dead - like a withering flower without sunlight.
Fully Accepted - Flaws and All
Avoid pointing out her flaws. Not one of us is perfect, but try to see her as perfect in everyway. This really makes them feel good
about themselves and allows them to open up fully to you.
Avoid judging her - especially on her appearance and her sexual past. Having said that, you shouldn't want to marry a woman who's
slept around indiscriminatingly.
She Needs Constant Reassurance and Respect/Validation and Appreciation
Women need to hear compliments all the time because they have never-ending doubts. I'm not sure if it's genetic or media-induced.
I'm thinking it's media that brainwashes them into thinking they're unattractive, men will cheat, men get bored, etc.
A woman's sexual identity and self-worth often (not always) rests upon your perception of her.
They need physical validation and non-physical validation.
When you're in a relationship, give her physical validation by lustfully gazing at her, touch her like she was irresistible, etc.
Acknowledge and compliment her non-physical strengths like her honesty, intelligence, loyalty, big heart, etc. This, oddly, is rare for
a woman, which is quite depressing, but you can use that deficiency to your advantage by complimenting her non-physical traits..
Notice and appreciate her efforts. A woman puts a lot of thought into their appearance. She wore that dress for a reason, she did her
hair for a reason, she made you soup for a reason, etc. When you notice and compliment her, it's like you're reading her mind and
she'll love you for it. For example, say "That dress really brings out your waist or legs", "These earrings make you look elegant", and
"Thanks honey, that soup really helps fight off my cold."
She Wants to Feel Special
Focus on her positives..and do so in a way that makes it sound personal and unique to ONLY them. You should make her feel like
she's an original and thus irreplaceable:
"YOUR voice is enchanting".
"YOUR smile is so disarming."
"I can't get enough of YOUR stunning eyes"
"I've never felt such a strong connection before"
"You're so different from other girls"
She Wants Affection
Tell her you love her and mean it. They need to hear this.
Give her lots of touch - stroke her face, stroker her hair/brush hair behind her head, hold her hands, kiss her hands, kiss her face (I
feel like I'm describing chimps grooming each other).
Give her long loving gazes (relaxed, blink slowly) and your face should have a kind of joy/happiness with your guard down. She
should feel loved if you do the gaze right.
You should frequently remind her that you're thinking about her with small gestures: texts, hand written notes, calls, small gifts.
Women love bragging rights as much as guys do. Send gifts to her workplace and she'll be the envy of her co-workers unless you're
How often should you do these things? Do them when you sense that she's not as cheerful or if she's down otherwise if you overdo
it, you'll come across too feminine.
There's a book called the Five Love Languages. It explains the 5 ways you can make a woman feel loved:
Physical Touch - this person feels love when others touch them lovingly.
Acts of Service - this person feels love when others help them out or serve them.
Words of Affirmation - this person feels love when others verbally approve or affirm them.
Quality Time - this person feels love when others spend time with them.
Gifts - this person feels love when others give them thoughtful things.
The key is to understand which of these languages they respond to best and give it to them occasionally - like adding wood to a fire
to keep it burning.
She Wants Great Sex
When you two reach that stage in the relationship, it's important that you satisfy her. Read the Sex God Method by Daniel Rose.
Although that book talks about using sex to control a woman, I advise you not to. That's extremely low. I didn't write this guide so
you can become a scumbag.
Do Looks Matter?
Yes. However, they are one factor in the equation. Looks get you the audition. They are not a winning lottery ticket. Although, it can
seem that way because looks help a lot. You can be crappier in every way and many women will still date you and many will sleep
with you. You can be dumber, poorer, more violent, disloyal, etc
Good looks gets you more interest from girls, they forgive clumsy mistakes during your approach/conversation, they won't stereotype
The most important factors are height, adonis ratio (aka golden ratio) of shoulder width to waist width, body and facial symmetry,
Also, great looks can get you meaningless sex if the girl wants that.
It's not the end of the world to be average looking, but you can and should maximize your appearance with fitness, diet, grooming,
and fashion. That can get you up 1-3 points on a 10 point scale. Also, improve other non-look factors as much as you can to
compensate. It's like a plain looking girl can still be seem like a catch if she's fun to be around, loyal, etc. Although, it's much harder
for women because let's face it, men are very visual.